Why do people think parents aren’t capable of teaching their children?

Because they resent seeing all the home schooled students getting into the best colleges and graduating with honors and going on to high paying jobs, while their own children have to go to community colleges that they flunk out of because they never learned studying skills and because their children end up working in fast food places.

You are your child’s first teacher. Every parent is a teacher. You know your child better than anyone. I have friends who homeschool for various reasons. If you and your son are willing, I am sure it will work. It sounds like your son is involved with others his age in various activities and would do well in the homeschool setting.

As a teacher, I have seen students leave our school and return only to have scored 25 points lower on IQ and struggle. It depends on the quality of the school.

My friends who successfully homeschool do it through a charter school or along with the county. They provide an IST, a credentialed teacher who monitors the work being done and is available for extra support to you and your son. All of this is free of charge.

Sounds like you are very well educated and have researched your options. I am sure your son will do great.

Yes, assuming the child is ready and motivated. I don’t believe learning to read at an early age should be parent-directed, but if the child wants to read and is asking for help, parents are certainly capable of following the child’s lead and giving whatever help is needed. Simply reading to a child regularly, from an early age, is the best way to foster reading readiness and interest in reading. Both myself and my daughter were very early readers, but were not really “taught”.

You probably are wonderfully capable of teaching your children at home. But to answer the question of why so many people think parents aren’t capable of teaching their own children, it’s probably because we see so many parents who DON’T. I live in the inner city. Too many parents are uninvolved, and essentially abdicate any teaching role once their children enter a school environment. It may start in preschool programs, where parents think they just turn their children over to others, and at the end of the process somewhere in 12-14 years, the children come out educated.

My parents and grandparents were doctorate-level teachers. I am a teacher with a Master’s degree. But I tell my students and their parents what my dad told me: never let school interfere with your education. I was lucky to have parents who took me to concerts, museums, trips, the theater, etc. and taught me how to behave in many situations. And we were FAR from wealthy–teacher’s kids–remember?

If school is helping your kids, then that is well and good. All my kids went to public schools, and their schools helped them become successful people. My youngest just finished her post-doctoral degree in a medical specialty from Harvard this summer. But if the school situation is stopping your children from learning and experiencing what is necessary to become a decent, educated human being, then it’s interfering with their education.

I get a lot of grief in this homeschooling section of Yahoo Answers. I think people here are often so defensive that they won’t listen to any ideas that don’t validate their own. (Kind of like some of the other camp don’t want to hear the good side of homeschooling.) I can only imagine the kind of frustration that has created this attitude. Those of us who aren’t homeschool advocates no matter what don’t get heard.

Anyway, the answer to your question is epidemic levels of incompetent parenting.

Serena, thanks for posting the link to that article. I loved reading it, as it really hit the nail on the head. I wish everybody worried about a homeschooled child’s socialization was required to read it.

As to your question, I’m not sure why people think that parents are not capable of teaching their children. Granted, some parents probably aren’t capable, but some school teachers aren’t capable of teaching their class either. The vast majority of both parents and teachers are capable, in my opinion.

Who else is going to give a child one-on-one attention? Who cares more for the child than anyone else in the entire world? Who wants the child to succeed in life? Who has the time to devote purely to the child’s interests? Who will go out of their way to make lesson plans that fit the child’s learning needs? There are so many other questions that can be asked here, but you get the point. A good school teacher may care about each of the 25 to 30 children in her class, but it’s just not feasible to create a curriculum to meet each child’s needs and interests. And even if it was, the child moves on to a new teacher the next year and has to start all over again.

School teachers spend time learning the curriculum that they teach. Even if they took classes in college on the subject matter, the things they are required to teach change every year or so, so they do have to spend time learning new material or presentation formats. Fortunately, they have resources, such as mentor teachers, textbooks, the internet, and workshops to learn new things.

Parents who home school also need to spend time learning the curriculum to teach their own children. Even if they took those classes in college, the stuff they want to teach their children may be different or may need to be taught in a different way. Fortunately, parents have resources, such as mentor homeschooling parents, textbooks, the internet, and workshops to learn new things. See the parallel?

Anyway, congratulations on making the decision to homeschool! Ignore all the naysayers and enjoy the time you spend with your son. And congratulations on graduating from college! Best of luck!

~Kyanna

Hello, I am a 14 year old girl. In other words, I am a student and I attend a public high school. Well, it sounds that only adults have been giving their opinion, so I guess I decided to say a little bit. As I was reading through the answers that people have been giving you, I realized that many people gave bad voting scores to those who thought that “school is good because they let your kids socialize with peers”. Even though that may be true, I can understand why that angered you.

The website that you linked reads, ” No Thank You,

We Don’t Believe in Socialization!” Do you actually believe that socialization is not such a big factor? I mean, on that website, she gave real life adult issues that are similar to how some students are treated at school. Well, that’s stupid. Teachers only do that as a form of discipline. I mean, in that article, she makes it seem like socialization is just a complete waste of time. But it’s good that you put him in those programs because at least he gets to make friends. Kids usually need other their age to talk and hang out with.

Other than the socialization thing, I guess you’re qualified to teach as long as you know what to teach. I mean, there are bad influences at school, but then at home school, your child won’t be able to experience a lot of what many other kids their age are doing. Will he never feel how it felt to speak in front of a classroom, making a speech, watching the clock hoping it would tick faster till lunch, the teamwork needed for a group project, the physical activities learned during P.E., falling in love with his first childhood sweetheart, staying up late doing homework, or that nervous feeling in his stomach right before a test?

My point is that, you are qualified to teach your child at home, but don’t you think that your child will ever wish to be “a normal kid who goes to school”?

Some parents are qualified, others aren’t. You do sound qualified, but being a college student is practically a full-time job. Will your son be left on his own a lot, and will that be good for him? And there is a larger issue here. The bullying problem can’t be solved just by keeping him home. I agree he had to be removed from the school where it was happening. But he may need counseling to deal with the effects of it, rather than just hiding at home. And transferring to another school for a fresh start might be a better solution, unless there are factors involved that you fear may be repeated. Don’t forget that the transition to a junior high school can be rough for a lot of kids, not just yours. Yet most of them learn strategies for dealing with the adjustment.

As a caring parent, you need to ask yourself how the bullying got started and also whether you are adding to your child’s problems by overprotecting him. You also sound as though you are responding rather defensively and belligerently to people who probably have your son’s best interests at heart. Capable you are, but omnipotent you aren’t. Don’t try to cure everything all by yourself. Enlist some help.

By the way, are you a single mom? If not, what does the boy’s father think about your plan?

Sometimes I think that they realize that they personally are not intelligent enough to teach their kids and so they assume no parent is. Other times I think some know they should homeschool, or at least be more involved in their children’s education and so pick on homeschoolers to sooth their conscience. If you find a good answer let me know.

Somewhere along the way someone brainwashed society into believing that mass-educating, foul socializing and free childcare was right for everyone. I am appalled to those that are more concerned with socializing than an actual education. Hence our countries continuing failing grades, test scores and stanford testing scores in public school systems. When the grades drop, the school system drops their standards simply to make them look good, they would not dare admit to people that they really cannot educate children as best as they think they can and frankly they have several children who fall through the cracks. It is sad, 6th graders know what crack is and how much it cost and the closest corner to purchase it, but can’t do simple multiplication, and this is not heresay or opinion, it is fact, research it yourself. Among other things, the ridicule, name calling, cursing, sexually explicit talk and actions are not the way I wish to socialize my children. We are among the rest of America, we participate in it all day while publc school children are confined to a school desk all day being lectured on something they may already know, never know or do not even care to know. Life skills, life lessons and real world situations while public schooled children have textbook smarts, and lack the thinking skills to put them into their every day living. Every child has the potential to think and learn on their own, but they will do exactly what is expected from them, and in public school, sadly they are not expected to do much.

I reckon it is because they equate “teaching” and “educating” with “schooling”.

They have no real experience of families who home educate so they fall into the trap of believing that parents who choose to educate their own kids are simply trying to recreate and copy the work of schools at home!

Home educators know nothing could be further from the truth but people who either go to school or went to school have nothing else but their own experience of “education = school” to base their beliefs and opinions upon.

Anyone who thinks how much parents manage to sucessfully teach their kids between birth and age 6 must be daft (or misled) to believe they suddenly become incapable on their child’s 6th birthday! LOL!

Hannah

PS ROFL at the article. Read this one in a book the other day as well: ‘schools often insist children, especially younger children, spend recess outside. Can you imagine if adults were forced to spend every one of their tea breaks standing around in the car park!’