***** How about a little story that includes these phrases?
2. When’s the last time that the mailman gave you a package?
3. What are you going to do with that once you get it?
4. Who do you think you are …… Dick Cheney?
5. Have you ever been to Paris in the spring?
6. See, blondes really do have more fun……
BONUS phrase :::::: Did you just trip over a crack in the sidewalk or are you drunk out of your mind !!!!!!!!
Favorite Answer
Modern Day Virginia
“Annie’s Second Phone Call”
subtitle…… “A Package Arrives”
Annie was once again at her computer: Once again writing a story about her beloved characters in Dodge City, Kansas,Circa 1876. She smiled as she remembered the phone call she had received the other day. She was still in a flurry, as a matter of fact. James Arness had actually phoned her, expressing his interest in her stories.
She sat still, staring at the computer, until those “little gerbils in her head” started spitting out her latest story. Her fingers flew to keep up with their chatter.
(((RING))) “Darn! …… Hello.”
Maggie, her elderly neighbor: “Would you like to come over for dinner?”
Annie:” Oh, thanks anyway, Magaroonie. I just had dinner…………cherry pie and a hot dog.”
Maggie:” (1) Dinner…….. you call that dinner?”
Annie tried to politely end the conversation so she could return her full attention to the keyboard.
Maggie: ” You know what? My son and his family are coming over tomorrow morning to take me to a day at the spa. I’m so excited……(6) See, blondes really do have more fun! Even those who need a little help from Clairol.”
Annie:” That’s great, Maggie. But I’m here at my computer on YA …….I ‘m just about to shoot someone in my story.”
Maggie:” (4) Who do you think you are …… Dick Cheney?”
Annie:”Hey!! That’s funny. Wonder if I can work that in.” They both laughed and then she returned to her story.
Annie:”Let’s see now….Hmmmmm. Okay………
Her Story:
Festus Haggen and Doc Adams were having another of their inane conversations.
Doc:”Festus. (5) Have you ever been to Paris in the spring?”
Festus: “Paris……mmmmmmm……. Paris? Is that the town that’s located just above Abilene? Well, can’t say as I have. But I’ll tell you this. I’ve been to Topeka in the winter. And I’m a’tellin’ you, Doc, it was so dad blamed cold that a ……Where you goin’,Doc?”
Doc:” Amazing . Simply amazing.” He shook his head as he walked away.
Annie smiled as her could see this playing out in her mind.
(((RING))) “Hello?”
James Arness:” Sunny? Hi. It’s me.”
Sunshine, I mean Annie, almost shouted into the phone……
“Hi Jamie! Hi! ”
He chuckled…..”I swear….You really ARE Sunshine. Am I disturbing you?”
Annie:” Heck no. I just wrote a funny bit with Festus and Doc.”
Jamie laughed:”Gee….. Kenny and Milburn were two swell guys. They sure used to crack me up.” He paused. “Will you read me what you have, so far?”
Annie cleared her throat,took a swallow of her ever present Diet Pepsi, and started reading.
Jamie:” That’s great, sweetie! Just great! Are you SURE you were never associated with the show? Come on. Tell me.”
Annie:”Jamie….. If I had had ANYTHING to do with ‘Gunsmoke,’ I guarantee you…..or as Festus would say…..I GARantee you, you would have known it. I would have caused such a ruckus I’d have been thrown off the set!”
They talked some more about “Gunsmoke, and then he said:
(2) “When’s the last time that the mailman gave you a package?”
Annie:”Why? What are you………” The doorbell rang.
“Jamie? I need to get the door. I’ll take the phone with me.”
Annie opened it and found a Federal Express man holding a thick folder. She quickly signed for it and got back on the line.
Jamie: “Open it up, sweetie.”
Annie did everything but bite it open. Well actually, she even tried that. She simply could NOT get it to budge.
Annie:”Doggone it. I need a knife.” She went to the kitchen and started cutting it open
Jamie:”Be careful, SunnyMac.”
She nearly cut her hand! “You just called me……..That’s Matt’s nickname for Sunshine.”
Jamie:”Is that okay,” he asked as only a gentleman of his caliber would?
Annie:”It’s …….. Perfect.”
She finally opened the folder.
Jamie:”Be careful. Everything in there is important. You should find a contract……. for you to look over. Don’t sign anything, yet! There is also a plane ticket and a check………
It’s what they call their ‘show of sincerity’ check. Now here’s what I want you to do………uhhhh. Sunny? ……..Sunshine??
Annie was living out the dream she had had for almost a year.
Jamie:””SUNSHINE?!”
Annie:”Yes. Yes I’m here.”
Jamie:” I was just talking with JJ this morning. Oh, I’m sorry….JJ is…
Annie interrupted……. “He’s John Meston ,Jr.,isn’t he?”
Jamie:”How did you know that?”
Annie:”Jamie. I’ve lived this moment many times in my mind.
I’ve written the script, if you will…………Jamie?”
Jamie:”You’re beginning to really intrigue me, young lady.
Listen,….. JJ wants to see another story of yours……Can you email me one?”
Annie:” (3) What are you going to do with that once you get it?
Jamie:”I ‘ll bet you already know. After all…. You’re writing the script!”
” When’s the last time that the mailman gave you a package?” inquired Walt as he sauntered into the kitchen.
“Hello to you too you ingrate,” replied Bunny, the wife.
” Well Bunny, don’t forget that we should be getting linguini one of these days,” chided Walt.
“Oh yeah? What are you going to do with that once you get it?” Bunny threw down her dish towel and stormed off. Walt was going to have none of this – his woman was not to talk back. He went to the safe and got out his hunting rifle.
Diane watched and asked, “Who do you think you are …… Dick Cheney?” The mere question brought Walt back to reality and he asked Diane to drive him to McDonalds.
As their Malibu pulled into the McDonalds lot, a bum could be seen perched near the ashtray next to the door.
“Great,” muttered Walt. However, a bum was not going to keep him from his evening meal. They proceeded to the door when the bum suddenly asked, “Have you ever been to Paris in the spring?”
“Uh, no,” answered Diane quickly as she followed her dad into the buildling. She wondered what he cared what time of year it had been when she was overseas.
Suddenly the McDonalds imploded. Everyone with a block radius was incinerated beyond recognition. Two blocks away, in a shiny black Mercdes sat Bunny and a tall, dark and handsome chef, giggling. See, blondes really do have more fun……
BONUS phrase :::::: Did you just trip over a crack in the sidewalk or are you drunk out of your mind !!!!!!!!
So, where are you flying to?
Sunshine, are you just going to leave us high and dry after you finally get to meet Jamie in person? Love Ya!
